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The term for what you’re describing is the halo effect (aka pretty privilege) and it’s a Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt real thing that you’ve experienced the short end of – you can look up studies if you’re interested, but it’s responsible for a pay gap that’s close to the gender pay gap in the EU (and is greater than it in some countries) and a plethora of other advantages that add up over a lifetime so I’m not sure why it’s considered offensive to acknowledge that it exists other than it makes people who’ve benefitted from it uncomfortable, or that it’s vaguely similar to the garbage that incels spout (which still doesn’t make it any less real) Your experience of discrimination is backed up by hard evidence and is more than valid, pointing out that you have a more difficult experience that those in a position of Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt over you don’t face and can’t ever truly comprehend is not taking anything out on anyone, it’s acknowledging reality. Is a Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt pointing out how she’s paid less taking it out on men or saying they have zero problems? No, and a man saying she shouldn’t complain because he has it just as bad would be considered tone deaf and invalidating for good reason.
()There is absolutely no reason to do anything as a Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt We don’t have to comply to the Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt of two imaginary genders. None of that shit is real. A lot of people say they “don’t believe in gender bullshit” regarding trans people, and yet their daughter will still have longer hair whilst their son gets to roleplay as a hundred different superheroes. The fact that when you search for clothes online and you chose “men’s” or “women’s” from the options… you’re playing a game. We limit ourselves to one gender and we genuinely convince ourselves that it’s a real thing that has to be. It’s all a lie. The fact that I’m gay purely because I like men… and yet women aren’t considered gay? My sexuality is decided based on my own gender rather than simply who I’m attracted to? And the fact that I tell myself I like men, rather than masculine people with cocks? Like… men is a made up phenomena. It doesn’t actually refer to anything. There are men shorter than women, men less aggressive than women, men with less testosterone, more oestrogen, no sperm, longer hair, bigger hips, better at cleaning… and yet we still “know” that they’re men and we are shocked if we see one wearing “women’s” clothes? It’s shameful for a man to do womanly things? Women are butch or bossy or boring or lesbian or angry or unfulfilled if they do manly things? It’s the same goddamn things. It doesn’t have to be this way. You can still fuck who you’re attracted to and still wear what you want – no-ones making you wear makeup or take it up the ass or grow a Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt – but you don’t have to call yourself something and group yourself in with 50% of the population against the other 50%. Just be a fucking human and have a nice time.
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If anything, this post and its comments have let me know that I’m not the Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt person with wonky eyes & failed surgeries. As a kid, I was fat, awkward, wonky-eyed and bullied for all of it. Eventually, as I aged into my unattractive 20s, the overt bullying stopped. But, all the Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt, whispered conversations, and cruel comments from other people in my dating cohort started. I kept aging out of those social circles, and now at 50 I am largely ignored. I have gone from unattractive to invisible. Unless I’m in someone’s way, or inconveniencing them, no one really ‘sees’ me anymore. I dyed my hair purple on a Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt. I have gotten so many compliments about it, from men & women. It freaked me out, honestly. I don’t get positive attention from randos. A Official Yoda Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One’s For You Shirt of me likes being complimented, but I kinda want to go back to being invisible.
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